Saturday, April 16, 2011

You've GOT to be kidding me.

Could someone please explain to me... what the hell is so damn scary about death?


My mum is terrified of dying. One of my best friends is terrified of dying. Two of my "friends" are terrified of dying. One (that I know of) of my mum's friends is terrified of dying. I can honestly rattle off about eight other people just off the top of my head who I don't consider anything at all that are terrified of dying.

What. The. Hell. Is. The. Big. Deal.???

EVERYONE DIES. Okay?! Everyone and everything that lives, must die. Simple as fucking that. They don't call it the 'Circle of Life' for nothing. Go watch the Lion King for crying out loud - Mufasa explains it well enough to his little brat. It's ALL about keeping a balance. As humans, we already fuck up most things that we're involved in without even trying... but to try to avoid death? Are you fucking NUTS?!

Hold on, I'll rewind a bit here...

Apparently... some scientists are claiming... that within a span of twenty to forty years... we will have the knowledge and technology to make humans live forever.

Fucking. Immortality.


Like... this astounds me.

Abso-fucking-lutely ASTOUNDS ME.

Who in their right mind would want to be stuck in whatever life they have FOREVER?! Until the end of fucking time?! Which, really, probably would come shortly after this "miracle" hits the market because, let's face it, we all have someone we want to see dead. Wipe that option off the table, and we're likely to go batshit crazy... even more so than we are now. Running that certain prick over with your car just for the principle alone would get a little tiresome after a while when all they do after is brush themselves off and go buy their morning coffee. Honestly, some bright-spark of a country would probably say "fuck it" and start a nuclear war JUST to see what the hell would happen.

...Actually, that sounds like something I would do~

Crank up "Sound of Madness" as my soundtrack and just raise some Hell~ I can already think of one... two... THREE people who I know would be right there laughing like madmen with me. It's good to have some friends who are so close to my mindset~ Others try to claim a seat amongst my ranks, but I've flat out denied them. They aren't psychotic. They just claim to be because they're amused by those of us who actually are. I've only met one other person that can truly equal me... and he's fucking hilarious~


Getting back on topic... can no one else see that this is a very bad idea? How to explain this in simple tongue... have any of you seen the movie "Daybreakers"? Granted, they turned everyone into vampires in that thing, but the same vague idea stands with normal people. Eventually, you'd want to die and be unable to do so. I honestly cannot think of any other situation that would be more painful than that. It's like those people who are fully-paralyzed. You're trapped inside yourself and, no matter what anyone says, your life is completely out of your control.

By taking away our ability to die, you're actually taking away our ability to live as well.

Yeah. Now that's deep~

You know who it is that I find rather ironic that they fear death? Religious people. No, I'm not being mean... no more than usual, anyway. What I mean is... aren't they supposed to be covered? Their souls under insurance or warranty or whatever? That was the idea I got from the whole concept. Shouldn't it be us heathens who should fear the final curtain drawing shut? Since we don't really have a fucking clue what we're actually doing or what awaits us? Is it black? Is it cold? Is it just the abyss? Do we start over? I believe that latter. But religious people... don't they want to meet their maker, as it were? It honestly confuses me. These people actually fear an afterlife that they are currently preparing for. They supposedly already know what is waiting for them on the other side, and yet... they fear their prize after being good little boys and girls? How does that make even a lick of sense? Unless you haven't been good little boys and girls, in which case... sucks to be you, buddy~

Hm. Or is it more... that we fear dying and not actually death in itself? That we fear the process of? That these people fear in what manner they will make their final scene? How painful? How traumatic? How quick or slow? The 'foreplay', for lack of a better wording~

Yep, I just compared death to having sex.


Speaking of an impending gorey demise (I still love that song~), I thought I saw Slender Man again. Turns out it was a statue~ Stupid churches and their screwed-up windows... why must the church put a statue right in front of a goddamn window? I couldn't see it very well, but I'm sure that's what it was. Probably a statue of Jesus or whatever...

...And now I just compared Slender Man to Jesus. EXTRA BONUS POINTS~~

(I miss my Nintendo NES.... I wanna play Mario, dammit!)

You know, while writing this rant, I started thinking even more about death and, from there, my thoughts went to the death nightmares I had growing up. There were some pretty fucking intense things getting thrown at my young mind back then... and I remember so many nights that I'd cling to Zeddy for dear life and try to disappear with him. Zeddy was and is, of course, my old teddy bear. I still have him, but he sits on the top shelf above my desk now wearing my graduation hat - the All Seer of my room, if you will~

I've had Zeddy for as long as I can remember. He has grey hair/fur(?) that's just the right kind of softness/stiffness and these brown eyes that just look so damn thoughtful~ He came with a hat and a scarf, but I ripped those off when I was little cause they made him look like a dweeb. I also gave him a haircut when I was like... three or four... I have a vague memory of hiding behind the couch as I did it, in any case. THREE CHEERS FOR WEIRD KIDS. Anyway, his hair is about the third of the length it was supposed to be, but I STILL say he looks exactly as he should. Plus, he has whiskers~ My mum sowed on some brown string to make them because, apparently, he NEEDED whiskers to my little young mind. He's just... completely unique~ Not another one like him anywhere. It seems I made sure of that~

I was such a freak.

Not much has changed, neh?

I don't know why, but some of those nights when I had buried my face into Zeddy... when I would talk to him under the covers just to break that deafening silence in the night... they've been coming to the forefront of my thinking lately. I hadn't even looked at that stuffed toy for years, and suddenly things are now actually reminding me of how much I used to depend on him? Seriously. What the hell?


  1. I think the fear of death extends from the spiritual immature concept of a reward/punishment system. Most people expect upon death to be punished for their "sins," even if they really don't have any sins to weigh them down. We exist in a constant state of if I do this, then this will happen. It's not so hard to extend that to death. Having lived before, I'm not too scared of dying again this life, but most people don't remember their past lives, which is not necessarily a bad thing.

  2. Perhaps my opinion on the subject is twisted since I've died far too many times to count in my head, but I still consider it ridiculous. Even being stalked by Him, to fear death is to fear life. Personally, I'd fear a life WITHOUT death being possible. Consequence or not... it just doesn't make sense to live your life worrying about that next step.

    I've been told I was a Native American in my past life, but I have no idea if that is true...