Five Days

Damn, what the hell is this? I didn't sleep for more than a handful of minutes across three nights and I didn't even get one headache. I catch a few hours Saturday night, and I wake up with the worse one yet. Well, migraine, I guess... sensitive and all that crap. Insomnia is sounding like a good hobby to pick up right now... which is actually what I did last night...

Update... this should be fun to explain...

The last five days... I don't even know what to tell you about them.

The police were here around noon on Thursday. By the time they had screwed off, it was already early evening. Getting my family to leave me alone at that point was not an easy task - my parents didn't really like how I wasn't being... all that polite in response to the "answers" the authorities were giving. I think they think I'm trying to pull some kind of insurance claim through all this  - especially since some loose-wing idiot saw my stupid bear laying on the floor of my car covered in blood. I didn't have a real answer ready for that when they pulled it out - I just said mostly the truth: that, yes, it's mine, but I found it laying on the porch at my friend's place. That it was why I rushed home. Tanya backed this up without a second thought when they contacted her, but it seems like they're thinking I left it on the porch there myself before going inside to visit her. Neverminding, of course, that Tanya said her kid mentioned a "Tall Man." I'm obviously the guilty one here. Of course, because this makes so much sense for an insurance claim - let's gut my horse, scatter the remains across the paddock, cover this fucking toy in its blood, and then leave it somewhere I can "find" later! That's not over-the-top at all!

Yeah, I got defensive. Yeah, I got pissed. The smart ass of a cop suggested that maybe it was an animal attack then... even though there weren't any prints or other marks to suggest that and, in any case, he hadn't heard that dissection had become typical for animal attacks these days.

It's the video games, I tell you. They're blamed for every other form of violence - why not this? Seriously. How crappy is my luck? I have Slender Man stalking me, one of my best friends may get involved because He's a goddamn pedo, and the police think I slaughtered my own horse. What the HELL?

Oh, and I left home Thursday for a couple of days after I got in a fight with my mum. Can't forget that...

That night... all I wanted to do was burn that goddamn bear. BUT guess what? Evidence. It was collected. As. Fucking. EVIDENCE. Why did my parents have to call the cops in the first place? To make life even more difficult, apparently. I needed time to myself so I could think things through. I spent the night in my car along the side of the road. No incident, but I didn't really sleep at all.

The next day, I swung around to Tanya's. She had left me some... rather assertive messages on my cell that made it clear we needed to talk. I did try to argue back through a text (I hate using that feature) but what she sent back gave me no other choice.

"Michelle. I spent an hour cleaning the blood off my kid. We need to talk. NOW."

......I hate kids.

I went... and never felt so uncomfortable in a friend's house in all my life. We spoke for a good few hours with her pacing and ranting around the room and me telling half-truths sitting on her couch. I'm surprised she didn't throw me out, personally. I was close to throwing MYSELF out. Eventually there was a long pause that was only somewhat filled by Hailey playing with her plushies. She was wearing the straw cowgirl hat I gave her for her birthday last month. I could tell she was wearing it a lot - it was getting that broken-in look....

I asked Tanya what she wanted from me. None of my "answers" were good enough and I knew it. She made a frustrated noise, gesturing with her hands for the added effect that I've grown used since we became friends. Getting Tanya mad had always been an amusing show to witness... but not this time. This time it wasn't about how the lady at Timmy's gave her a dirty look after she dyed her hair vibrant purple; it wasn't about her asshole neighbour in the bottom part of the duplex turning off their water.... this was about the safety of herself and her kid. She demanded TRUTH. She told me how I looked like Hell (said I looked like I'd smoked a "fucking fat one with the windows up"), how I was walling up again after having let DOWN a few walls over the past year or so and she wanted to know WHY. She rattled off the things that have happened lately like she was reading the summery for a horror movie on the back of a DVD case. She... told me she was worried about me. Honestly worried about me....

She's worried about me, and I'm the one that practically took Slender Man's hand and brought Him to her and Hailey. Fuck...

I gave her the usual pitch. To trust me. That she doesn't need to know. I tried to tell her that the more she knows, the more danger she'd be in, but she just called it bullshit - me trying to avoid her questions. She yelled at me to tell her what had changed - what was changing me - that we were best friends and that this was the safety of her kid on the line. I... snapped.

"Dammit, it's not that simple! I'm trying to protect you the only way I know how and you're making me draw you in further than I already have! I won't let you get involved, UNDERSTAND?!"

"Getting my kid covered in blood isn't 'involved'?!"

"Not compared to what COULD HAPPEN!"

We stopped when Hailey started crying. I tried not to look at the girl as Tanya went to her - what Hailey looked like the other night with all that blood over her kept flipping to the surface in my head, making my stomach churn. I don't like kids. They're fucking creepy... and smiling while covered in blood? That counts as extra creepy. Still... it's Hailey. I have to do what I can. I told Tanya then that I had to go and to call me if anything comes up - no matter what the time. I left the house, going for my car... and it wasn't until the bottom step that I felt that "watching you" feeling crawl up my spine. I thought I saw a blur of black move out of the corner of my eye... but it was gone a second later. There was nothing there. I don't know at this point if it was Him or just paranoia... getting hard to tell the difference...

I spent another night in my car. I couldn't stand the thought of going back to that property - my home - yet... but on Saturday I forced myself to suck it up. I went home. There was still tension between my mum and I, but that isn't exactly unusual. That's when I caught up on the blogs... and noticed that Canada now has a yanky invader. Morningstar is up here now... as if I didn't have enough shit at mind already. He wasn't exactly subtle with his first day - it didn't take long to figure out what area he's in. It was sort of surreal... being able to know where one of Them are. I knew for certain by Sunday morning - the whole fiasco was on the radio. I'm not exactly worried though. I have more important things to worry about and the guy himself is like a tornado - I'll know if he gets too close for comfort. Besides that, I doubt I'm on his hit list. Sometimes it's good to be considered nothing~

Sunday... I spent following Mystery's advice. I went to where we buried Bogie and started digging. It took a lot longer than I'd hoped and it was raining like crazy and the smell was getting far too ripe to be around... but I got what I needed. I used my brother's hunting knife to cut away the flesh and took the two cannon-bones from my boy's front legs. I... I felt like I was going to be sick, and not just from being soaked through and through. I'd only just set the two bones aside when I got that familiar shift in my head that meant I was on the verge of laughing. I bolted before I even saw where He was - bones in hand. It took me an hour to steady myself (and my stomach) enough to go back and finish covering Bogie back up. After everything, I wasn't going to let coyotes pick at him and haul him off. He deserves better than that... he deserved better than what I had to take from him too. I only hope that having these bones means something. Some sort of weapon... I really need it right now. I have people to protect and He's only getting closer...

I'm cleaning the bones now. To do it right is going to take a few days. Bleaching will only weaken the bone so after I'm done soaking it, I'll use some hydrogen peroxide to sterilizer it.

I'm tired, but alright. Keep rocking, guys.