Wednesday, October 5, 2011

It's in my head.

All of it.

It's ALL in my HEAD. Thats okay right? It can stay there better than real better than when it WAS real I can ignore it in ym head right?? nonocan't iignore it can't stop SEEING IT. 

seeing him

Morningstar

he's there and i can't stop can't stop SEEING HIM watching the barn burn him stab my dad the blood the GRIN that fucking goddamn son fo a BITCH i don't want to see this don't want want to please make it stop SOMEONE MAKE IT STOP

he's here. he was. thought so. corner of my eye. down the hall. but can't be. must be Him. screwing with my head eh? Hehehe not funny. NOT FUNNY NOT FUCKING FUCKK NO you're NOT HERE how can you reach me likethis you can't you can't IMNOTLAUGHINGYOURENOTHERE you can't do this i cant what do you WANT?!!! please leave me alone i cant i have to protect its valerie i can't leave her cant forget cant NOTSEE see it all over again and again and agian and again

eeven in the mirror mirror went to splash water on me collect myself control myself BREATHE try to. try to stop the shaking. the headache. numb the pain ignore the pain IGNORE IT

he grinned at me behind my reflection

the fucking grin

he's not here. can't be. fuckingCANTBE i feel him feel him across the city like a pulse a connection connection connectionconnectionbetweenfamily NO FUCK NO please just let me stay here

here


here


They aren't here. Not Him or Morningstar. What ...is happening to me...? He's reaching me still and I'm not even... He... He's not... it won't stop. In my head. Fuck it won't stop IN MY HEAD He won't... He won't...

Father won't let me forget.

Game still in process.

My move.

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