Thursday, November 24, 2011

Guys... I need advice here. Please.

Valerie isn't sleeping.

I didn't really notice it at first, because it usually takes her longer to fall asleep than me,  but... there's no denying it now. Not only are her eyes open LONG after I've turned in for the night, but when I wake up, she's already staring out the window, or standing in front of the mirror, or some other highly worrying non-behavior. Twice I've jolted awake because she was up and moving around. So last night I stayed up the entire night and watched her, and she never once even laid down, let alone shut her eyes for any measurable length of time.

Our schedule is as screwed to hell as most Runners, but before at least I could be sure she'd take care of herself and sleep a couple hours every night! Now she's just awake all the damn time, and if she sits still for longer than twenty minutes she gets up and goes to some other area of the room, and if we're in the car at the time, she'll rap her knuckles against the window a single time. Only once. And then back to zoning.

I don't know how long this has been going on, but if I had to guess... I'd say since Sunday.

Ever since that damn message on her blog... she hasn't slept.

I know she fucking wrote it too. It was her. I don't know what the hell is going ON in her head! She still doesn't respond to me but she'll type out a section from some story onto Blogger? WHY? What's the goddamn relevance? I don't... I don't understand it. I went and had a shower. I come back and my laptop is on, sitting in front of her. "Post Published" on the screen. I just... I don't get it.

God I've BEGGED her to talk to me. When that post came up I thought maybe she was coming back, but... nothing. She wouldn't even look at me, wouldn't look at anything, just like always. I've pleaded with her to sleep. Just that... whatever the fuck she's thinking... to STOP IT and just goddamn SLEEP.

All she gives me is a blank stare back... only with bloodshot eyes... and bags that just keep getting heavier and heavier... Fuck, how long can a person LAST without sleeping? A week? Less?

I'm PAST getting worried. I'm terrified. I've been using every trick I know to try to make her drowsy, but none of it works.

Please, someone help me. Someone make sense of this. I'll try anything at this point...


  1. As crude as it sounds, your best bet may be to force some nyquil or Ambien or something in her to at least get her to sleep.

  2. You could try euthanizing her. I guarantee she would sleep after that.

  3. I think she's coming back. Her mind and body are booting up. Her soul's having trouble rebooting though. Keep her intact, damn it.